Mentoring Our Boys –

I did it! I just released my son to take off on his own. He graduates from high school this coming Saturday. So last Sunday I knighted him with a ceremony and I presented him with a sword.

The Sword

On Brian’s thirteenth birthday, I presented him with a medieval Crusader sword. But I told him the sword wasn’t his yet. It would be a symbol of his training into manhood and he would receive it when the training was done. He has had that sword sitting out for more than five years waiting for the day it would be his.

The Training

While being a good husband and father makes a man a good role model for a son, I felt like I should do more. I wanted to mentor my son along with some other boys. I wanted some other men to be involved as well. After reading Raising a Modern-day Knights by Robert Lewis, I began meeting monthly with a group of guys. We played, roasted hotdogs over a fire, then talked about Christ-centered manhood. We did this once a month for most of five years. Squires2Knights Ministries was born from this experience as well as a book I wrote titled Squires to Knights - Mentoring Our Teenage Boys

The Manhood Ceremony - Becoming a Knight

Last Sunday evening I had my wife drop off my son about 3 miles from our house in the country. One of his grandfathers was waiting for him at the side of the road. After 10 minutes of walking and talking, his other grandfather was waiting along the side of the road. This continued through seven different men - pastors, mentors and even his current boss. I walked with him the last five minutes - although he’s heard enough from me, so I didn’t offer much.

When we got to our house, we had a crowd of men and boys (young men) along with family members waiting around a campfire. I then presented him with his sword. The following was my prepared statements as I capped off the ceremony:

“While history has stories about good knights and bad knights, the image we all have of the medieval knights is one of impeccable character. They were known as gentlemen. They were respectful to authority as well as respectful to the common people. They were courteous to all women of all ages. They were counted on as defenders, skilled in battle techniques. And they were known to be loyal and faithful to their God and their king.

A protégé under a knight was known as a squire. He began his training at about age 13 and was knighted at about age 18 to 22. We’ve had this sword since Brian’s 13th birthday and today he is 18 and about to graduate from high school.

The sword is a widely recognized symbol of knighthood. And scriptures use the sword in many images of biblical truth. My favorite is found in the description of the Armor of God in Ephesians 6. The sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God – it is the only offensive weapon described in the armor of God. We know that God created with His Word; we know that Jesus is the Word; and we know that the Word of God is our source of truth. So tonight I present Brian with this sword, which has been a symbol of his training since he was 13 years old.

Along with the symbology of the sword, I also adopted three Bible verses for Brian and some of his friends. The core theme for these biblical truths has been found in 1 Corinthians 16:13-14. Be on your guard, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. Do everything in love. The Greek word for “act like men,” andrizomai (an-drid’-zom-ahee), actually implies a masculine courage, also translated “be men of courage.” The word for “Be strong,” Krataioo (krat-ah-yo’-o), is used in another verse to introduce the Armor of God. Ephesians 6:10 says, Finally, be strong in the Lord and in His mighty power. Put on the full armor of God …” These two Greek words in the Bible are used to describe real men.

Now let’s go to 1 Kings 2:1-3. King David is about to die. He says to his son, Solomon, “Be strong, show yourself a man, and observe what the Lord your God requires…” Sounds like there’s something to this masculine strength.

Another great word used to describe a real man is found in Job 40:7. God says to Job, “Brace yourself like a man; I will question you, and you shall answer me.” The word used here for man is Geber, meaning man, strong man, warrior (emphasizing strength or ability to fight).

Now here’s something that’s very cool. The name we gave our son, way before his teen years, has special meaning. The word for Brian is of Celtic origin meaning strong, noble and high. Brian’s name fits right in with God’s descriptors for men.

Brian is a warrior at heart. He is not intimidated by anything and he has a natural drive to defend those in need. He is also driven to stand firm on what is right and true as well as to stand firm in his faith. These Greek and Hebrew words used in the Bible to describe real men, andrizomai – man of courage, Krataioo - strong, and Geber – strong man or warrior, are great descriptors of our Brian. He is a strong man of courage.

Brian, would you please face me and lower to one knee.

Brian, I dub you a knight. And I bless you as you embark on this next stage in your life. You will do well for yourself, but more important, I know you are committed to God, to your future family, and to the Body of Christ.”

Posted on May 7th, 2008 by Jeff Purkiss
Filed under: Fathering/Mentoring, Rite of Passage